


One of Those People

by Ms_Starlight



Category: Dark Angel
Genre: Angst, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-11
Updated: 2010-01-11
Packaged: 2017-10-06 04:03:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ms_Starlight/pseuds/Ms_Starlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Don't tell me you're one of those people..."</p>
            </blockquote>





	One of Those People

Zack sat and watched as a tiny monarch fluttered by to land on a pristine, white flower, the insect’s spindly legs holding up its body as if it were floating on a distant cloud. He’d been sitting in the park for hours, the thick grass beneath him flattened to the ground under his weight. But nothing in particular had captured his roving attention until the small butterfly flew by.

He stared, hearing Max’s voice in his head.

_Don’t tell me you’re one of those people._

She’d looked up at him with a derisive groan when she said it.

Zack struggled with the idea of eternity. The mere concept of “forever” made him uncomfortable. How could anyone believe in Heaven? How could anyone be happy forever? Did he even want to exist forever? No, definitely not – but at the same time, the idea that someday he might no longer exist turned his stomach as well.

Maybe he _was_ one of those people. He liked to think that there was some meaning to everything, some destination. And the idea that he’d lived before in some other body in some other time was comforting. Perhaps he’d done something terrible in another life and this one was just a brief punishment.

Everyone held on to something, some source of hope and purpose. Max had Logan and their cause, friends, and a job. Zack had nothing. Maybe being one of those people, he thought, wouldn’t be so bad. Then once Lydecker finally caught up with him, he could start over, be normal, and live the life he was so bitterly jealous of now. He wouldn’t have to be afraid or live on the run if he were somebody else.

When he’d suggested to Max that they’d known each other in another life, he’d meant Manticore. But when she’d misunderstood, thinking that he was religious, it had given him something to think about.

He didn’t want forever. And he didn’t want to remember this once it was gone. What he really wanted, the desire at the very base of his world, was a second chance. He wanted a mother and a father, real brothers and sisters. He wanted to go back and enjoy childhood. And he wanted to go to school, get a job, maybe someday even marry and have children of his own.

He wanted to believe – have faith.

And he didn’t want to think that this one screwed up life was the only chance he was going to get.

Sometimes he imagined that he’d already lived a hundred lifetimes, that he’d done everything and been everywhere. He’d loved, lived, and suffered…and nothing was inherently evil because it was all meant to be.

He shook his head.

No. Manticore had definitely been evil. Even if it was the gateway to another life, he’d rather go on as he was now than go back there. Without knowing for sure what would happen to him, that step was one he was too frightened to take.

Who could say, after all, that the rules of nature would even apply to someone like him…grown rather than born, a patchwork soul that might just disperse once freed from his mortal coil.

The butterfly he had been staring at flew away then. It looked pleased with its lot, needing nothing more than a flower and a sunny day to make its existence complete.

Sighing, he got up and stretched his aching muscles.

_Don’t tell me you’re one of those people._

If only he could be…


End file.
